What heat!
You're sweating, your shirt is sticking to your back, you can smell a gentle odor of sweat all around you... Yes, it's finally here, after months spent in unbearable cold, we've switched to the other side: the heatwave. How not to die of heat? Well, first of all, avoid these places that become simply horrible when the temperature exceeds a certain point.
Cars parked outside
Attention to all those who have a car parked outside in Paris, or to users of Autolib'. Maybe avoid getting into your car in this weather, because the combination of sun + greenhouse effect windows leads to burning hot seats. Special mention for the metallic part of seat belts which becomes very vulgar when it is accidentally touched.
Hey, this hurts like hell!
The infamous Line 13 during rush hour
We can all agree that Line 13 is the absolute worst. It's always way too crowded, we're packed like sardines... Basically, it's just hell. And of course, when it's hot, it's even worse.
Line 13 is like Tinder when you're single: it's the option you should consider only in case of absolute necessity.
The street
We could have replaced it with "everywhere". Cities are worse than the countryside because of the buildings that heat up and retain the heat. Damn buildings. So, in Paname, all you have to do is stroll down the street and you'll be dripping everywhere. Yum.
Honestly, prioritize parks.
In the Nightclub
Yes, it's summer, we want to go out and all that. Go to the terrace, go to your friends' place, but for goodness sake, you're crazy to go to the nightclub. A poorly ventilated place, filled with moving and sweating people, that you join to sweat as well, like a pig? (excuse these strong words, our writer has a complicated past with sweating, apparently, editor's note)
Anyway, nightclubs are lame, and our colleagues from Le Bonbon Nuit even suggested alternatives to clubbing. So no excuses.
In a tent
Huh??? In a tent??? No, we're not suggesting that there are tents you regularly visit in Paris. But if you've ever been to a Parisian summer festival and got a camping pass, you know what we're talking about. These tents are like saunas.
Don't be fooled by their cute appearance. And don't think it will be romantic if you're in a couple. The heat will only be worse, especially if you... well, you know. Trust us, we tried, it wasn't pretty.
Châtelet - Les Halles
We end with a classic. Châtelet - Les Halles, the worst maze in the world and the very essence of Paris. Everyone knows it, everyone hates it, but everyone would cry scandal if it were taken away. Yes, it's chaotic, but it's our chaos. And it gets hot when everyone rushes in!
But, you know what? Go for it, go ahead, sweat it out. As long as you drink water, it should be fine. And if people bother you, sprinkle them a bit. Well, why not? You only live once, right? Plus, it will refresh them, they will thank you.
There you go, if you avoid these places, you will have already escaped the worst heat spots in Paris. Hang in there, see you after the heatwave and holidays!!! How? Oh well, actually, I've just been told that I still have articles to write... See you soon in a shady place then... Kisssesss.
